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Martian War Machine '53
Type: Martian war machine (piloted)
Width: 42 ft (13 m, est); Weight: 20 tons (est)
Basic Features: Martian transport
Advanced Features: Heat ray, skeleton ray, probe tentacle, force field, electromagnetic legs
Intelligence: None (piloted)
Land Speed: Moderate
Mech Level: Three (light heavyweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Martians; Enemies: Humanity
Film: War of the Worlds (1953)
Landfall in the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: These War Machines were more than capable of melting any human military forces deployed against them, and would have succeeded in their mission were it not for the fragility of the squishy Martian crew inside. The craft traveled using three legs, which were electromagnetic and normally invisible, making the ships appear to levitate.
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Review:
1,000 Misspent Hours
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Martian '53
Species: Unclassified humanoid; Type: Martian native
Height: 4 ft (1.2 m, est); Weight: 100 lb (46 kg, estimated)
Attributes: Cute, but not very friendly
Powers: None revealed, offensive capability via Martian War Machine, interstellar travel via meteor form
Intelligence: Average
Land Speed: Slow
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): Earth microorganisms
Allies: Martians; Enemies: Humanity
Film: War of the Worlds (1953)
Landfall in the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: These aliens coveted Earth, and laid careful plans over many centuries with the goal of planetary conquest. They launched their Martian War Machines into space, contained within meteorites for the journey. But, oh no! They forgot to pack the spacesuits. They're only Martian.
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Review:
1,000 Misspent Hours
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Chani
Type: Martian guard robot
Height: 10 ft (3 m, est); Weight: 1.5 tons (est)
Basic Features: Claws, armored
Advanced Features: Vaporizer, interstellar travel via saucer
Intelligence: Basic programming
Land Speed: Slow
Mech Level: One (welterweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Nyah; Enemies: Humanity
Film: Devil Girl from Mars (1954)
Landfall in:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: The giant robot enforcer of Nyah, comely emissary from Mars, Chani was an imposing machine capable of destroying any opposition a Scottish village could throw at it, including a barn, a tree, and a truck.
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Review:
1,000 Misspent Hours
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Bat Rat Spider*
Species: Unclassified chimera beast; Type: Alien
Height: 40 ft (15 m); Weight: 15 tons (est)
Attributes: Bite, claws
Powers: None revealed
Intelligence: Animal
Land Speed: Moderate
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Unknown; Enemies: Humanity
Film: The Angry Red Planet (1959)
Discovered by the:
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Additional Data:
Monster Moviepedia
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Description: This Martian monster's six long legs were initially mistaken for alien trees by humans. It did not take kindly to getting one of its limbs whacked by a machete, so it attacked the astronauts in response, only to be blinded and driven away by their freeze ray. Poor thing.
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Review:
1,000 Misspent Hours
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Martian Amoeboid*
Species: Unclassified cyclopean amoeboid; Type: Alien
Width: 120 ft (37 m, est); Weight: 4,500 tons (est)
Attributes: Tentacles, amphibious
Powers: Infectious touch
Intelligence: Animal
Water Speed: Slow
Kaiju Level: Two (middleweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Unknown; Enemies: Humanity
Film: The Angry Red Planet (1959)
Discovered by the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: An inhabitant of scenic Mars, the red planet, this creature erupted from a lake to defend its territory, and provide a warning to invading cocksure human astronauts.
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Review:
1,000 Misspent Hours
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Martian Carnivorous Plant*
Species: Unclassified carnivorous plant; Type: Alien
Tentacle length: Up to 20 ft (6 m, est); Weight: Unknown
Attributes: Gaping maw, prehensile vines
Powers: None revealed
Intelligence: Animal
Land Speed: Immobile
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): Rooted in place
Allies: Unknown; Enemies: Humanity
Film: The Angry Red Planet (1959)
Discovered by the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: Even the flora of beautiful Mars was hostile to humans; this somewhat disturbing, yet oddly appealing Carnivorous Plant is just one example.
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Review:
1,000 Misspent Hours
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Short Martian Monster*
Species: Unclassified predator; Type: Alien
Height: 16 ft (5 m, est); Weight: 4 tons (est)
Attributes: Enormous maw
Powers: None revealed
Intelligence: Animal
Land Speed: Slow
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Unknown; Enemies: Everything
Film: Battle Beyond the Sun (Небо зовет, 1959)
Discovered by:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: When this slow, deceptively harmless-looking Martian Monster encounters a problem, it swallows it whole. If that's wrong, it doesn't want to be right.
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Review:
1,000 Misspent Hours
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Tall Martian Monster*
Species: Unclassified predator; Type: Alien
Height: 20 ft (6 m, est); Weight: 4 tons (est)
Attributes: Claws, gaping maw
Powers: None revealed
Intelligence: Animal
Land Speed: Slow
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Unknown; Enemies: Everything
Film: Battle Beyond the Sun (Небо зовет, 1959)
Discovered by:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: This disturbingly moist and stabby Martian Monster picked a fight with the wrong waddling spherical Martian Monster, and discovered it wasn't on the top of the food pyramid. Moist.
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Review:
1,000 Misspent Hours
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Giant Martian '76
Species: Unclassified humanoid; Type: Alien
Height: 120 ft (37 m, est); Weight: 1,000 tons (est)
Attributes: Martial arts
Powers: Ray gun, access to advanced technology, interstellar travel via star ship
Intelligence: Average
Land Speed: Moderate
Kaiju Level: Two (middleweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Martians; Enemies: Guan Yu, humanity
Film: War God (戰神, 1976)
Landfall in:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
Daily Mail
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Description: These Giant Martians chose to spearhead their Earth invasion in China, and boy was that ever a bad idea. Guan Yu the demigod of kicking ass made sure they would never make that mistake again. Not even the USA invades China, you big dumb Martians!
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Reviews:
Tars Tarkas
Die, Danger, Die, Die, Kill!
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Cyclops Alien*
Species: Unclassified organism; Type: Super-powered alien
Height: 12 ft (4 m, est); Weight: Unknown; significant mass filling up a chamber
Attributes: Tentacle with slobbering maw
Powers: Mind control
Intelligence: Average
Land Speed: Immobile
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): Glowing eye, immobility
Allies: Mind-controlled slaves; Enemies: Humanity
Film: Contamination (1980)
Landfall in:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: This hypnotic alien was brought back from Mars as a tiny seed by a benevolent astronaut. Able to grow to significant size in warm conditions (Colombia was perfect), the tentacled beast then laid thousands of football-sized eggs that explode with acidic goop whenever a curious human gets too close.
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Review:
A.Y.C.Y.A.S.
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Sil
Species: Unclassified alien-human hybrid; Type: Super-powered alien
Tentacle Length: 20 ft (6 m, est); Height: 5 ft, 10 in (1.8 m); Weight: 145 lb (66 kg, est)
Attributes: Claws, projectile tongue, spines, tentacles, leaper, wall crawler
Powers: Super endurance and strength; regeneration, shape shift from human to alien form
Intelligence: Exceptional
Land Speed: Fast
Kaiju Level: One (welterweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Unknown; Enemies: Humanity
Film: Species (1995)
Born in the:
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Additional Data:
Alien Species Wiki
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Description: Earth scientists received transmissions from space with instructions on how to splice alien with human DNA, and it sounded like a great idea to them so they went ahead with it. Sil is the result, a beautiful alien seductress interested in one thing; making babies. For reasons unknown, the hominids got all upset about that and hunted her down. What can you do? There's just no pleasing them.
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Review:
1,000 Misspent Hours
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Martian War Machine '96
Type: Martian War Machine (one pilot)
Height: 60 ft (18 m, est); Weight: 165 tons (est)
Basic Features: Claws, stompy, armored
Advanced Features: Death ray
Intelligence: None (piloted)
Land Speed: Moderate
Mech Level: Two (middleweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Martians; Enemies: Humanity
Film: Mars Attacks! (1996)
Landfall in the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: These handsome Martians invaded Earth in 1996, using their flying saucers and death rays for some long overdue population reduction. Just for fun, they threw in some giant robots to stomp on the trailer parks.
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Review:
Roger Ebert
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Martian '96
Species: Unclassified humanoid; Type: Alien
Height: 4 ft (1.2 m, est); Weight: 75 lb (34 kg, est)
Attributes: Truculent; Powers: Access to advanced technology including ray guns, saucers, war machines, advanced transplant techniques, and more; interstellar travel via flying saucers
Intelligence: Average
Land Speed: Moderate
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): Slim Whitman's Indian Love Call
Allies: Martians; Enemies: Humanity
Film: Mars Attacks! (1996)
Landfall in the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: Sassy aliens from Mars, these humanoids had a promising start with their conquest of the Earth; everything was going great until they were introduced to the inconceivable horror of Slim Whitman.
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Review:
Roger Ebert
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Eve
Species: Unclassified alien-human hybrid; Type: Super-powered alien
Tentacle Length: Up to 20 ft (6 m, est); Height: 5 ft, 10 in (1.8 m); Weight: 145 lb (66 kg, est)
Attributes: Claws, tentacles, spines, leaper, wall crawler
Powers: Super endurance and strength; regeneration, shape shift from human to alien form, telepathy with species
Intelligence: Exceptional
Land Speed: Fast
Kaiju Level: One (welterweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Patrick Ross; Enemies: Humanity
Film: Species II (1998)
Born in the:
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Additional Data:
Species Wiki
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Description: A clone of the original Sil, Eve was kept away from the menfolk and provided with medications to lower her natural aggressiveness, but once Patrick Ross landed on Earth, true love could no longer be denied.
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Review:
Den of Geek!
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Patrick Ross
Species: Unclassified alien-human hybrid; Type: Super-powered alien
Tentacle Length: 20 ft (6 m, est); Height: Up to 12 ft (4 m, est); Weight: Up to 1,500 lb (682 kg, est)
Attributes: Claws, tentacle, spines, rapist, leaper, wall crawler
Powers: Super endurance and strength; regeneration, shape shift from human to alien form, telepathy with species
Intelligence: Exceptional
Land Speed: Fast
Kaiju Level: One (welterweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Eve; Enemies: Humanity
Film: Species II (1998)
Born in the:
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Additional Data:
Species Wiki
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Description: Mr. Ross was an astronaut who brought a little present back from Mars, alien DNA! So, he immediately breaks quarantine to share his precious miracle with every woman he can find with his new stabbing tentacle penis; at least until he met his one true love, Eve. How sweet it was, so romantic.
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Review:
Den of Geek!
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Giant Martian '00
Species: Unclassified humanoid; Type: Alien
Height: 10 ft (3 m, est); Weight: 600 lb (est)
Attributes: Helpful
Powers: Access to advanced technology, interstellar travel by means unknown
Intelligence: Exceptional
Land Speed: Moderate
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Martians, humanity
Enemies: Unknown
Film: Mission to Mars (2000)
Discovered by the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: These Giant Martians lived on the red planet centuries ago, but when it eventually became uninhabitable they decided to plant humans on Earth, and then left to explore the cosmos or something. They probably just told the humans that to be polite.
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Review:
Roger Ebert
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Martian Tripod '05
Type: Martian war machine (piloted)
Height: 60 ft (18 m, est); Weight: 60 tons (est)
Basic Features: Tentacles, cage for guests
Advanced Features: Death ray, probe tentacles, force field, interstellar travel by means unknown
Intelligence: None (piloted)
Land Speed: Moderate
Mech Level: Three (light heavyweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Martians; Enemies: Humanity
Film: War of the Worlds (2005)
Landfall in the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: These Tripods alternated between disintegrating and harvesting humans, which they used as fertilizer for a quickly flourishing red weed. Sadly, this invasion was also stopped by Earth microorganisms; it appears that Martians are fervently anti-immunization. These aliens were probably not from Mars, so "Martian" is used metaphorically in this instance.
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Review:
Roger Ebert
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Martian '05
Species: Unclassified humanoid; Type: Alien
Height: 5 ft (1.5 m, est); Weight:150 lb (68 kg, est)
Attributes: Avid gardeners
Powers: Access to Martian Tripods
Intelligence: Average
Land Speed: Moderate
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): Earth microorganisms
Allies: Martians; Enemies: Humanity
Film: War of the Worlds (2005)
Landfall in the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: Not only do these odd aliens refuse all vaccinations, they also hate wearing spacesuits, or even some Capri pants. All of these features combined doomed their invasion before it even started. Well, not the Capri pants, but those would have been nice.
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Review:
Roger Ebert
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Martian Tripod '06
Type: Martian war machine (piloted)
Height: 60 ft (18 m, est); Weight: 60 tons (est)
Basic Features: Tentacles, cage for guests
Advanced Features: Death ray, probe tentacles, transform from giant iPod to triPod
Intelligence: None (piloted)
Land Speed: Moderate
Mech Level: Three (light heavyweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Martians; Enemies: Humanity
Film: Scary Movie 4 (2006)
Landfall in the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: This alien named Billy had a son with an Earth girl, but his son was killed when Don King fell on him, so he invaded the planet with the ubiquitous Martian triPod. Millions were killed, but it's all water under the bridge; he said he was sorry and called the whole thing off. Don King survived.
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Review:
Horror News Net
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Thark
AKA: Green Martian; Species: Unclassified four-armed humanoid; Type: Alien
Height: 9 ft (2.7 m, est); Weight: 675 lb (307 kg, est)
Attributes: By weapon, brawler
Powers: None revealed
Intelligence: Average
Land Speed: Moderate
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Tharks, Thoats; Enemies: Red Martians
Film: John Carter (2012)
Discovered by the:
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Additional Data:
Encyclopedia Barsoomia
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Description: Tharks are a tribe of belligerent, war-hungry savages from Mars; just like humans, but with an extra pair of arms, and tusks, and no nose, but otherwise just like humans, sort of. Maybe a little nicer.
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Review:
Roger Ebert
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Thoat
Species: Unclassified herbivore; Type: Alien
Length: 18 ft (5 m, est); Weight: 7 tons (est)
Attributes: Horns, tail, trample
Powers: None revealed
Intelligence: Animal
Land Speed: Fast
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Thoats, Tharks; Enemies: Unknown
Film: John Carter (2012)
Discovered by the:
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Additional Data:
Encyclopedia Barsoomia
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Description: Thoats are the beasts of burden of Mars, used as food and transportation by the natives. They have eight legs, a broad tail, and a nice rack.
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Review:
Roger Ebert
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White Ape
Species: Unclassified predatory mammal; Type: Alien
Height: 15 ft (5 m, est); Weight: 5 tons (est)
Attributes: Bite, brawler
Powers: None revealed
Intelligence: Animal
Land Speed: Moderate
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): Blind
Allies: White Apes; Enemies: Not White Apes
Film: John Carter (2012)
Discovered by the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: White Apes aren't really Apes; they are grumpy aliens from Mars. They're not even white, but more gray. Anyway, these are powerful monsters with four arms and two legs that are surprisingly fast for their size. They are blind, typically nocturnal, and very aggressive. The perfect pet, really.
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Review:
Roger Ebert
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Woola
Species: Unclassified calot; Type: Super-powered alien
Length: 8 ft (2.4 m, est); Weight: 800 lb (364 kg, est)
Attributes: Bite, burrower
Powers: Super endurance and speed
Intelligence: Crafty
Land Speed: Very fast
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: John Carter; Enemies: Enemies of John Carter
Film: John Carter (2012)
Discovered by the:
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Additional Data:
io9
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Description: Woola is a lizard-dog from Mars; they are called calots. Calots have ten legs (six on the outside and four underneath) and can run at incredible speeds. Woola loves his Earth man friend, John Carter, as the human was the only one who has ever shown him kindness.
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Review:
Roger Ebert
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Empress of Mars
Species: Unclassified creature; Type: Alien
Height: 12 ft (4 m, est); Length: 30 ft (9 m, est); Weight: 6 tons (est)
Attributes: Tentacles, tail with possibly venomous stinger
Powers: None revealed
Intelligence: Average
Land Speed: Moderate
Kaiju Level: Zero (lightweight)
Weakness(es): None revealed
Allies: Unknown; Enemies: Humanity
Film: First Man on Mars (2016)
Discovered by the:
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Additional Data:
Wikipedia
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Description: The Empress of Mars politely welcomed the entrepreneurial astronaut Eli Cologne to her home, and he was very impressed with her cave of solid gold… perhaps too impressed, as he wore a hole right through his suit! He became infected with some sort of Martian organism, which improved his appearance and appetite considerably.
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Review:
Morbidly Beautiful
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